A mom who was slapped with a $120 fee after cancelling her babysitter has turned to other parents for advice, triggering an intense discussion.
The woman said she texted the babysitter six hours before she was due to arrive to let her know the family’s plans had changed “unexpectedly.”
Despite the sitter responding that it was “no problem,” the mom was shocked to receive a $120 invoice the next morning.
“I asked why. She said ‘I kept that evening available for you and turned down another family’,” the parent said on Instagram.
Although the mom “understood her point”, she said the pair had never discussed a cancellation fee and offered $60 for the inconvenience.
“She refused and said I had booked six hours of her time, whether I used them or not. Now I’m wondering if she’s right,” the mom continued.
She asked others what they would do in her situation – cough up the cash or outright refuse?
Despite hundreds of people weighing in, no clear solution has emerged as parents remain divided over the issue.
Numerous social media users took the side of the sitter and urged the mom to pay up; however, others said the $60 offer was more than generous.
“If the cancellation policy wasn’t discussed, absolutely not,” one woman said.
“Regardless of any policy, unless it was due to a medical emergency where someone was hospitalized, you have to pay someone when you book their time and cancel on them. Period. End of sentence,” another said.
So who’s in the right?
Kate Heussler, a Sydney mom and etiquette expert, told news.com.au she “can absolutely see the babysitter’s point.”
“When you book someone for six hours, you’re not only paying for the hours they physically spend in your home – you’re asking them to reserve that part of their life for you,” she said, noting that in this case, the sitter turned down another family, which resulted in a genuine loss of income.
“Six hours’ notice might sound reasonable on paper, but it’s not necessarily enough time to find another six-hour booking that evening.”
That being said, good etiquette works both ways.
“If a full cancellation fee was never discussed or agreed to, I don’t think it’s reasonable to introduce one retrospectively and expect the other person to automatically know the rules,’ Heussler said.
“Her response of “no problem” also reasonably suggests to the parent that there wasn’t, in fact, a $120 problem arriving the following morning.”
The mom had the right instinct when she offered an alternative payment, the expert explained.
“I’d view it as a reasonable gesture and a starting point for a conversation, rather than the mom unilaterally deciding that’s what the babysitter’s lost evening was worth,” Heussler said.
“Ultimately, good etiquette is less about winning the argument over $60 versus $120 and more about recognising that your change of plans can still cost somebody else something.”
At the end of the day, neither person “needs to be the villain here”, she said.
“Parents know better than anyone that plans can go spectacularly sideways – usually five minutes after you’ve done your hair and put mascara on. Life happens.
“At the same time you can’t pull a cancellation policy out of your handbag the next morning and expect everyone to know it was there. If you charge for cancellations, say so upfront.”
Mom refuses to pay babysitter while child is sleeping
In the meantime, a separate sitter drama has gone viral on TikTok after a mom tried to shave $70 off her babysitter’s bill.
When the caregiver informed the parent she should be paid $192 for the eight hours she was at their home, the mom argued that her daughter was asleep for three of those hours.
“Correct, but she is still my responsibility, even when she’s sleeping,” the sitter said, to which the mom responded: “We just don’t feel comfortable paying someone to sit on our couch while our daughter sleeps.”
The young woman pushed back and asked if she was supposed to stand instead.
Much to her horror, the mom said there was plenty to do around the house, such as dishes and laundry, and paid her a total of $120.
To make matters worse, the parent asked the young woman to come over and take care of her daughter again that night.
The sitter urged the couple to eat quickly as she would be leaving promptly after the child’s 7.30pm bedtime.
When the parents pushed back, the woman suggested the couple change their dinner reservation to a table for three.
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